Testimonials

I am part of the Social Prescribing team in South West London. I was supporting a vulnerable patient who had experienced a close family bereavement and their relative’s body was still in the hospital mortuary months later, as they were really struggling and felt they couldn’t deal with this. In addition, they had multiple mental health diagnoses, struggled with written communication, had never used a mobile phone or computer, was unemployed, on universal credit, and about to be evicted with bailiffs involved due to thousands of pounds of debt for care costs. 

I requested support to help my patient liaise with hospital and funeral directors to try and bring their relatives body out of the hospital and arrange a funeral, and with general 'death admin'. The doula provided an estimated 30hrs of in-person support, supplemented by texts and phone calls to keep things on track. This support was invaluable, as I would not have had the capacity or knowledge to provide it myself. 

She made incredible progress, and helped:

• Liaise with the hospital and arrange a cremation for their relative

• Agree a repayment plan with the Council

• Liaise with Council finance department about demands for care costs and agree breathing space while they went through the probate process

• Liaise with probate services and enabled them to begin working with a probate lawyer 

• Practise answering their phone and sending/receiving texts

All this was done with the utmost patience, kindness and dignity, always involving the patient in every decision and action. 

Having [doula]'s support has helped me get a much better sense of how doulas can support with after death admin and I am in awe of the service!

As a result of (doula)’s support, losing my father became a much more bearable experience. Our family is incredibly grateful that we were able to access an End of Life Doula, and we would like to thank your surgery for making it possible.

We are deeply grateful to (doula) for her care and support for our whole family through this very difficult time. We highly recommend that you continue with the End of Life Doula programme, so that other families who are going through the same thing can have the support that we had.

[My doula] has been far more than simply supportive — she has been an advocate, a guide, a calming presence and, at times, the person who helped give me back a voice when I felt unheard or overwhelmed. She has helped me navigate one of the most frightening and emotionally isolating experiences imaginable with compassion, dignity and humanity.

Throughout everything, [she] has shown extraordinary kindness, wisdom and emotional intelligence. She has never made me feel like a problem to be managed or a number to be processed. Instead, she has treated me as a human being deserving of respect, honesty and care, and I cannot begin to explain what a difference that has made to me psychologically.

She is genuinely one of life’s angels and one of the most remarkable human beings I have ever had the privilege to meet. Whatever death doulas are paid, it is not enough. There is simply no price that can truly be placed on humanity, compassion and presence during moments like these.

Please pass on my deepest thanks and appreciation to [my doula]. Her support has meant more to me than words will ever fully capture.

I work as a Ward Sister in an hospice which is where I worked alongside X in her role as End of Life Doula.

The staff were also reassured by X’s  presence as we knew that the person was in safe hands and that X would immediately ring the bell whenever she had any concerns/questions eg when the person needed physical care/symptom control etc. The Nursing and Medical Teams commented on how well X worked  together with us X  became part of the Hospice Team.

The work of this organisation is exceptional. They helped me as a next of kin to support the spirit of a wonderful relative who I still hold dearly in my heart. I can not recommend the service enough, for family members, for those positioned at the helm of the process and for the dying person too if they need to talk to someone other than those in the immediate care circle. Death is a difficult time, and you never need to go through it alone thanks to EoLDUK.

I called Christmas Eve to say my Father wanted to come home to be with his Family Christmas Day and to die at home.  He needed a person to be with him at night.  I called End of Life Doula UK to ask for support. After a short pause I heard the words ‘We can do that’.  My Father died at home with me at his side – the Doula gave me the confidence and support I needed to fulfil his wish.

Thank you so much for all you have done for our friend and her friends and family to support and guide us through this difficult journey of dying, death and mourning.

You have been invaluable to enable us all to cope with her loss in the best possible way.

Whatever the official role of a doula is, you have gone over and above in every way. 

I have the deepest admiration for your empathy, practicality and commitment (and humour). 

Her candid, yet warm guidance was a crucial part of the jigsaw that made it possible for my partner to leave us peacefully and for all that loved him to feel part of his final journey. I’ll be forever grateful and would recommend her support to anyone who is sadly facing a similar situation.

I found [doula] and she has been such an amazing support! A real life angel – she was attentive to every aspect of this situation; her listening allows for deep revelation about M, her life and her needs, medical but more spiritual at this ending stage of life. I felt her compassion , her courage and her strength. With [doula]‘s guidance we have put in place support for M to accompany her in this final journey and also seen to her medical needs. It feels that M is wrapped in loving care. 

I feel that I can get in touch with [doula] not only about M but any other situation where the end of life approaches- my own and those of my friends/ family. And I will do so.

She has transformed an intolerable situation into a place of support and love and courage. 

I am so very very grateful to End of Life Doula UK and most especially to [doula’s name].  I contacted EoLDUK  in January 2022 when my mum was really very poorly and in hospital. From the start of the process, everyone I spoke to was brilliant and I was quickly put in touch with a doula. [Doula’s name] was steady, wise, infinitely kind, caring and knowledgeable and always there when I needed her. She visited my mum in hospital which felt lovely. In the event, differences of opinion within my immediate family meant that I was very sadly unable to bring mum back to her own home to die. [Doula’s name] helped me navigate the grief of this, reassured me that there is no ‘right’ way, that things often do not go the way we might expect or want at these times and to understand that this was not a ‘failure’ on my part. End of Life Doula UK is an incredible organisation. I would recommend them to anyone facing their own or a loved one’s imminent death.

He [the End of Life Doula] was indispensable – he stepped in to do anything we needed and was 100% reliable and compassionate in those last months.

I was on my knees and needed respite from the care of my Partner who had MND.  The Doula stepped in at short notice to cover me and she also talked to the GP to get additional care so I could cope and spend good quality time with Neil.

Mum was in a Care Home. She was frightened of dying.  She needed someone to talk to about her hopes and fears before she died.  Two Doulas were made available to be with her night and day to soothe and comfort her and she went peacefully.  I am most grateful because without them I am sure she would have died in distress.

I needed to get my affairs in order because I am a single Woman who lives on her own and don’t want to leave a mess for Others’ to sort out. M helped me do my Advance Decision to Refuse Treatment and my Advance Statement.  She made it simple and a pleasure to do!  Thank you, M!

L was there for the hardest of times from when K was told that there was no more treatment she could be given, during the last weeks making cups of tea, doing housework, relieving me to sit with K right through to helping me plan K’s funeral.  I call L every now and then as we went through so much together to make K’s dying as good as it could be.  My heart is broken.

I enlisted the help of End of Life Doula UK when my Mum was approaching the end of her life. She had suffered from Parkinson’s disease for 27 years and was living in a care home. To this day I can’t believe how lucky we were. [End of Life Doula] was our saviour and I can’t imagine how this would have turned out without her. She understood what we were dealing with and dealt with our enormous difficulties incredibly skilfully. She helped us navigate through Mums death and her funeral. Mum had the most wonderful funeral and we were able to come together on that day to give tribute to the wonderful woman she was and that was 100% down to [End of Life Doula]. I can’t thank her enough. Losing someone you love is incredibly difficult, no matter what the circumstances and when it happens, we all need an [End of Life Doula].

I sought out (End of Life Doula)’s assistance when my father was nearing end of life after being admitted to hospital with late-stage dementia and acutely altered mental state. It was a very confusing time for myself and my mother. The comprehensiveness of the information and the sympathetic way that (End of Life Doula) provided it was hugely refreshing for all of us involved and gave us a lot more clarity. From that point on, I can safely say that none of the other staff involved in the end of life process came close to providing the level of service that (End of Life Doula) did. Had it not been for this assistance, the process would have been significantly more confusing and upsetting for all of us. Thankfully we were prepared for it and the process was far less daunting than it would have been.

I would like to begin with saying what a wonderful idea it is to have an end of life doula for people who need one. To make the final days easier in any way is sublime.

From X’s very first message I knew she was a special sort of person. Who would be perfect to have with you at the end of your days? X…for certain!

X opened up her communication to the rest of the family should they have anything to say to her. In Y’s final days  I believe we all sent messages of love to our beloved sibling.

I recently had the pleasure of working with an End of Life Doula.

She was working for one of our patients with lung cancer who had organised for X to be her end of life doula.  Y was an insightful patient and recognised that having a doula would help her situation.  Some of her family relationships were difficult and she knew she may need the support of a doula  to ensure her wishes were respected.

Y had complete faith in X and mentioned her the first time I visited her at home.  It was reassuring as her doctor to know that she had a trustworthy person in place to help her at the end of life and that she had met her and involved her in all her plans.  It made my discussions of advance care planning much easier as the idea had already been introduced and Y was comfortable talking about her wishes.

Unfortunately Y needed admitting to the hospice for escalating pain.  X needed to be called urgently as Y became rapidly more unwell and it was clear that she was entering the dying phase of her illness. X  came back early from holiday to be with Y and her presence was immediately a calming influence

X was so kind and caring with Y staying with her  24/7 for several days when she was dying and helping to reassure her.  When Y was not conscious X continued to stay with her, talking to her and being a calming presence in the room.

After Y died X knew what her wishes were regarding donation, funeral directors etc. and assisted in facilitating this also.

After speaking to the headquarters I got more information on who a doula is, what they do, and how I can have a doula as I am going through intense cancer.  A phone call later and I was introduced to Diane and a visit later and we were firm friends.  So a weekly visit was agreed upon.  We filled out the paperwork and I officially have a doula.

Well what a blessing.  Diane has gone into bat for me to ensure things are set in place for me.  There are so many things you do not know about – like all the forms to fill in for end of life care.  Do you want to be resuscitated?  These may be tough things to look at but really important.

To have someone gently assist you to consider all the implications is really important.  We Brits find it hard to talk about death !!  And who knew there was so much to do, and decisions to make around dying? So helpful to have a doula to do this with.  Diane has been a good friend and a blessing to have around during this rather intense time of serious illness.  So if you are dealing with death and someone suggests a doula – I would say “Go for it” amazing support for you at this time of life.  You deserve this caring and assistance.

I have certainly been grateful for Diane – who has been so willing to assist me whenever possible.  I cannot imagine going through something like this without my doula.  Thank you and bless you Diane for being you.

From the beginning, the doula's support helped me understand the course of my husband's illness and the ways in which I could support him. Simultaneously, she provided gentle guidance on how to cope with the new experience of the care home...Our doula guided me through the unfamiliar care home system, advocating on our behalf. My husband deeply appreciated the visits...he felt comfortable sharing his thoughts and concerns about the future with her. He eagerly anticipated each visit.

With our doula's help, we were able to set up an end-of-life plan well in advance, making all the necessary arrangements, including medication. This gave me peace of mind. It is difficult to describe how vital it was to have everything in place when the need arose...This allowed my husband to remain in the comfort of the care home.

The doula's support was invaluable not only to my husband but also to me. We had outings to gardens and open spaces, which gave me time to relax and share my worries and stress. She showed me how to navigate care home regulations and get the best out of the staff and management. Without doula's support, I am certain I would not have been able to cope with the stress and pressures of caring for my husband.

In summary, I remain very grateful to EoLDUK for enabling the continuation of this service. I cannot imagine how we would have managed without their support during our greatest time of need. Having someone like Aga to hold my hand and gently leading me through emotional and physical roller coaster is vital.

[Our doula] has been an incredible source of support for both my mum and me during one of the most difficult periods of our lives. Her kindness, compassion and professionalism have helped us navigate conversations and decisions that we would otherwise have found overwhelming. Through her guidance, we have been able to create a clear end-of-life care plan that truly reflects my mum's wishes, giving us reassurance that her comfort, dignity and preferences will be respected. Knowing that we are prepared has brought a sense of peace that is difficult to put into words.

As my mum's son and primary carer, I cannot overstate the value of [doula]'s support. She has taken the time to understand not only my mum's needs but also the emotional and practical challenges that I face as her carer. Her visits have given us confidence, reduced our anxiety, and helped us prepare for my mum's final stage of life and her eventual passing with greater acceptance and less fear. We are deeply grateful that this service, as it is making a real and lasting difference to families like ours. [Doula]'s work is truly exceptional, and we hope many more families will be able to benefit from her care, compassion and expertise.

My uncle is approaching his 102nd Birthday and although fully mentally competent he is unable to leave, or even turn in, his bed. For any face to face social contact whatsoever, he is reliant on recognised callers to his flat such as his Care Team, occasionally a trusted neighbour, or his family when possible (I, for example, live approximately 120 miles away).

This is why the visits provided by [doula] are invaluable to him,. The pleasure he receives from having such a cheerful and bright visitor is evident from the glowing terms in which he speaks of her - and also from the way in which he anticipates them keenly. The social contact, gentle conversation and mental stimulation is vital to his continued mental wellbeing and I am immensely grateful to [doula] for the excellent  and professional way in which she does this.

[Doula]is an exemplary ambassador for End of Life Doula UK and the excellent work and support they provide. I sincerely hope that this support can be continued as I am aware of, and grateful for, the benefits to [my uncle] from [doula]'s visits.