I am an End of Life Doula based in the Waveney Valley in East Anglia, now welcoming referrals across the region and online.
I came into this work the long way round — as a filmmaker, a chef, a person in recovery, someone who accompanied his mother to her death. What I discovered, in each of those lives, is that the thing most needed at a threshold is not expertise but presence: a calm, unhurried willingness to remain with what is unfolding, without flinching or rushing toward resolution.
My practice is rooted in spiritual care — in close attention to memory, meaning and the possibility of healing at the end of life. That might look like quiet companionship, prayer, ritual or simply honest conversation in a difficult room. I do not bring a template. I bring myself, and I follow your lead.
As a gay man of mixed heritage — Malaysian Chinese and Punjabi — I hold space with particular care for those who feel othered, in-between or unclaimed by the dominant stories around dying. I also accompany families in the diaspora navigating the grief that crosses borders: the gap between the country left behind and the country now called home.
My background as a film director and narrative consultant means I am skilled in drawing out life stories and co-creating legacy — letters, recordings, small films, simple story-sharing. As a trained chef, I offer memory-making meals: cooking beloved dishes, hosting intimate farewell gatherings, weaving food into ritual and remembrance.
Originally from the Kinta Valley in Malaysia, I now call the Waveney Valley home, where I live with my husband and our cat.